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Blog - Amplify your voice

by: kiki
Tuesday, June 30, 2009 at 12:10:00 PM EDT
Rating:

(The following is from Kikelomo, one of our youth activists in Nigeria)
 
The other day I went into a Primary Health Care center. Though I’ve seen it before, I never knew they offered such services. This faithful day I decided to go there and ask if they had information and services on contraceptives and condoms, and tell them some of the changes I've noticed about my sexual and reproductive health.
 
As a Youth Activist, advocating for young people’s reproductive health and sexuality, I’ve never had any experience using contraceptives so I knew whatever I was going to ask there has to be real. It made me feel I was representing other young people.
 
There were 3 nurses seated when I entered the facility and they all welcomed me nicely, even though they had this surprised look on their faces. Then I asked “Is there a youth Friendly Center here? I mean, is there a place where I can ask about sexual and reproductive health related questions”? Then one of the nurses asked me “Did someone send you here?”  I figured she inferred I was sent by someone to spy on them or something. So I responded “Don’t young people come here to ask questions and get information about their Sexual Reproductive Health?” Then she looked at the other nurse and smiled. At this point I was beginning to feel uncomfortable. She then said “No! Not that”. She offered me a seat and told me to make myself comfortable but then I thought, what can she tell me?
 
"What can you tell me about condoms and contraceptives?" I asked. She answered by saying condoms are used to prevent infections and pregnancy during sexual intercourse and it can be therapeutic. Condoms are contraceptives and there are different types of contraceptives for males and females. She talked about the different kinds of contraceptives females use and its side effects. At this point I started feeling funny. She said contraceptives are not good for single ladies, that it causes high blood pressure, complications at birth, infertility, fatness and so on. In my head I started thinking of everyone I know that has suddenly gained weight. Lol! But am I getting the right information? Oh my God!
 
She didn’t stop there. She also told me about her experiences with some teenage girls she had witnessed back at the midwifery school. She said the girl tried to abort her pregnancy, which nearly caused her death. The doctor had to bring out the baby and for the 1st time she saw a 5 month old baby, but then the baby later died.
 
So I asked again: "What should I do if I am pregnant?"
 
At this point the other nurse who had been listening just asked me: "Is your boyfriend working?"
 
It was so fast I didn’t know when I said “yes”/ Then I thought I never said I have a boyfriend, neither did I say I was pregnant, but I kept quiet and I just wanted to see where that was going to lead to.
 
Then the 1st nurse continued, she said I should first make up my mind to keep the child, and then I can tell whoever is responsible.
 
I asked again, "who else is it important for me to tell, should I tell my parents?"
 
She said, “Yes. The role of a parent in a pregnant girls life is key” but then I thought and asked, “what if my parents can’t afford to keep the child or they disown me or they refuse to identify with me, parents could be very difficult?”
 
She said no matter what I should keep the baby and as long as l was a Christian, God will take care of me. I was then wondering why her answers were so direct. I never said I was pregnant, neither did I say I was a Muslim.
 
She concluded that abstinence is the best after telling me a long story of a movie she saw and how some young girls in the movie got pregnant because of poverty and ignorance…. and so on. I was ready to leave at this point.
 
My experience could have been better, especially in the type of information l got. In fact, I’m thinking "what if I wasn’t a Christian? What if I had a true-life situation? What if I didn’t believe in religion?"

Comments
Great post, Kiki!

So sad that women have to go through such ridiculous "education" there...

# Posted By  AFY_Joe | 6/30/09 01:39 PM | Report | Reply
 This is a really interesting post, thanks!
It's crazy to see how much religious biases affect reproductive health care across the world, especially in care to young adults.  I'm involved in the Adolescent Health Care Communications Project which runs workshops for both doctors and young people in an effort to improve young people's health care by shrinking the communication gap between teenagers and their health care providers.  It sounds like this program would be a useful one beyond the US, as well!
# Posted By  Leah627 | 6/30/09 01:57 PM | Report | Reply
Wow. Thank you so much for sharing your experience. That sounds like a terrible health center. How can they even call themselves that, if they’re lying about sexual health issues? They gave you a lot of false information- you were right to feel uncomfortable. It’s terrible that “health providers” would seriously mislead people about their health, and not only that, but use religious pressure, assuming you practice a certain religion. I hate that.
Stories like this make me want to go into a similar clinic and see what my experience would be like. I wonder how my age would effect my experience- I’m not a teenager, I’m 23. I would hope that they would take me more seriously, but with stories like this, who knows.
# Posted By Mahayana | 6/30/09 08:20 PM | Report | Reply
Thanks so much for sharing this!
# Posted By Parent-of-a-teen | 7/1/09 03:01 PM | Report | Reply
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