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Thrust into a world where they begin to establish autonomy, students have been socialized to responsibly attend class, party in moderation, and become financially independent. When sex is such an important part of identity and autonomy in our culture, then why aren't students equipped with the tools to engage in safe sex and healthy relationships prior to their entrance into the college world? Some would say that college is where your identity is 'discovered' and that they must navigate all facets of life, especially sex, for themselves. To some degree I agree with this point of view. I agree that college is a time where you solidify most things for yourself, but I also believe that this individualistic approach is forced upon youth by the lack of desire of parents/guardians/teachers to provide advice and help in the arena of sexual issues for fear of embarrassment.
I applaud both MTV and Dan Savage for providing edgy and controversial material for the sake of being a resource to many as well as being a catalyst for discussions that are historically uncomfortable. This is important progress in the media, but in the personal lives of young people it is a mere step in the direction of learning to have both healthy emotional relationships as well as healthy sexual relations.
Recently, The Pennsylvania Liquor Control Board has made national news for pulling an ad made public by Control Tonight, a campaign seeking to raise awareness surrounding the issue of heavy drinking and its relation to sexual assault. The ad, pictured below, shows a pair of women's legs, seemingly lifeless, with panties pulled to the ankle. The caption next to the legs reads "She Didn't Want To Do It, But She Couldn't Say No." Furthermore, the ad goes on to urge friends to take responsibility of each other to avoid the risk of sexual assault.
Though this is the general rule of thumb for partying, and a staple to maintaining a meaningful friendship, those who contend with the ad say that it places blame on the friends of the victim as well as the victim herself. Rather than denouncing victimizers, the ad is being perceived as placing fault on the victim for having poor self-control, inhibited by alcohol. It is being perceived that only people who don't have good friends are victimized, or that you are not a good friend if you are close with someone who has been sexually assaulted. While I understand and agree with the message I think the ad INTENDED to convey, remaining vigilant in situations that sexual assaults are most likely to occur, especially where drugs and alcohol are concerned, I do think that the delivery of the message was both dated and insulting. The caption, "She Didn't Want To Do It, But She Couldn't Say No", is especially damaging. The tagline is ambiguous in the way that it insinuates that the inability to physically say "no" due to unconciousness is a form of consent; and that a sober-minded woman would be able to show discretion but when intoxicated, her desires overrule her and she acts on impulse, only to wake the next morning full of regret, calling it assault. Either way, this is the age old attribution to sexual assault that a woman must have done SOMETHING to attract her victimizer, that she must have ASKED for it. Were her clothes too tight? Was she dancing too provocatively? Obviously everyone needs to take personal responsibility for themselves when drinking alcohol. Obviously friends should take care of one another in party environments as well as other realms of life. Obviously any prevention methods possible to protecting yourself where the risk of sexual assualt is magnified should be taken. But most importantly, it is obvious that regardless of these things, when rapes are committed it is solely the fault of the rapist. Bringing that offender to justice is the only thing that should matter.
What Do You Think? Preventative or Perverse?
