Twice in the last week, I have been told to see either a plastic surgeon or a podiatrist to deal with my "fat toenails" that can be shaved down. No, there is nothing wrong with my toes. Until last Thursday, I had no idea there even was such an operation!  It's one more way I can't win in the beauty myth.  There is a very slim ideal of beauty in America, and I was born with the genes to promote most of 'the natural side'. But the unnatural side- shaving off all body hair, manicures, pedicures, makeup, tans, being under a size 6, long hair, etc. I don't do much about.  And while surgical toenail reshaping may be the newest and most ridiculous requirement yet, I don't think it will be considered so "ridiculous" in 5 years. Which is unfortunate, because it is.

The originator of these comments is my mother. The same mother who taught me the feminist ideals of choice and civic duty, who made Cecile Richards a household name, and whose contributions to integrating disabled students have earned her school district awards and literally helped to start the public library system in our small town. I am indebted to my mother's feminism for so many reasons. The first question she asks anyone I bring home is "are you pro-choice?".  But my mother's feminism still encourages a lot of class privilege and hetero-normativity. My mother grew up never expecting to work a day in her life.  The public sphere is brunches, Junior Charity League, and a few other usually apolitical philanthropic causes. Her work here has also changed what I think is important: I could not imagine a week in which I am not actively involved in local community causes. That is part of my feminism.

But what I view as essential feminism include a lot more. I believe in intersectionality. I believe there is a link between racism, sexism, ableism, ageism,  classist thought, religion, and other markers of difference or marginality.  I believe you cannot solve one problem on it's own- that they are all symptoms of the same problem and the marginalization of one group is a threat against all people.

The fight for beauty has taken the focus of a lot of  feminists away from other issues. It affirms the privilege of class and says "if you continue on this regimen, if you work hard by shave your legs, keep your hair straight, spend time putting on 'natural looking' makeup and have surgery to correct those fat toenails, you are a part of society and those with power will listen to you!"  That's the line of thought that has strangled my mother's feminism.

And I refuse to let it strangle mine, toenails be damned.

(this has been crossposted to my blog at Lklouise.com)