I was at a party last night that was on the whole quite enjoyable. When is standing in a cramped hallway and dancing with your favorite people not enjoyable? However, there was one particular party guest I did not enjoy, well, I certainly laughed a lot at the time but if I had not been in party-mode I probably would have tweeked a little. Let me paint you a picture.

A seemingly friendly looking guy, who I'm not sure anyone really knew, spent a lot of time all over the ladies. And in theory, that's fine, if the ladies love him, let him be all over them. If a girl wants to flirt with him, or have him try to pull her back onto a couch when she tries to get up and leave after he creepily kissed her on the forehead, then there's no problem! But when this gross guy is constantly pulling and holding onto girls, and reacting in a visibly pissed off way when they refuse his advances, in a way that says "Fine, f****** b**** doesn't want me whatever," THEN there is a problem. I watched him just slide behind some of my friends, dance all up on without introducing himself, then slide away disappointed if the girl he was dancing on didn't acknowledge him warmly. So yeah, this guy was pretty sleazy.

But you want to know what's ironic about this situation?

He was wearing an armband. You know, those "awareness" bands that were so trendy years ago and are now ubiquitous? He was wearing one that said "No Victims - No Violence."

You know who produced those armbands? College of Charleston's victim assistance and prevention program. You know what sort of victims this program serves? VICTIMS OF SEXUAL VIOLENCE.

So, this guy must care about rape, right? Or sexual assault, right? Like, if some girl was attacked by a stranger in the bushes, I'm sure he would care a lot, I'm sure he would be righteously angry. But in a party situation, where everyone is supposed to be "cool" and "open," this guy clearly has no clue what consent is. I could read his thoughts on his face, he was thinking "don't get all worked up, I was just trying to be friendly, geez, can a guy not flirt with (read: put his hands all over) girls he doesn't know anymore?"

I doubled over laughing when a friend and I noticed this guy was wearing that armband. It was hilarious. It was absurd. It was really really really sad. And honestly, he's lucky he didn't try to talk to me or my friends again after we noticed, because I don't think I could have resisted asking him about it. I would have said something like "Oh wow, that's great you care about sexual violence, maybe you should start asking for consent in your OWN life." But, right now, I can only take comfort in the fact that all of my friends present, both boys and girls, found the same thing funny, and I'm lucky to be surrounded by people who see the irony in the situation.

crossposted at typical leigh