Yes, ex-masturbator t-shirts.  And don't worry-- if you're too godly to ever have masturbated, there are others sins that you can broadcast on your chest and brag about no longer engaging in.  Thanks to the Passion for Christ Movement (P4CM), you can buy a shirt that proclaims yourself an ex-hypocrite, ex-diva, ex-Porn Addict, ex-fornicator, or even (shame of all shames!) ex-homosexual. 

When I saw the ex-masturbator t-shirt, my first thought was “who the heck would ever wear this?”  They are bold, after all, and if you believe masturbation to be a sin akin to sex, why would you declare that you once engaged in it?  My dad reminded me that evangelical Christians are all about owning up to their sins and repenting for their past misdeeds, so that explains why people would admit something with pretty big embarrassment potential.  Still, it’s hard to imagine that these shirts would leap off the shelves.  That’s when it hit me: just like most of us here at Amplify want to de-stigmatize masturbation, so too do conservative Christian youth groups like P4CM.  Their website even preaches, “We pray that you will join us in breaking the silence on an issue that has stayed silent for too long.”  This similarity between seemingly diametrically opposed groups surprised me.  However, the surprises stop here.  Groups like Advocates for Youth and the Passion for Christ Movement may use similar means, but toward very different ends.  Elsewhere on their website PC4M touts a link to an article that discusses “the lies behind masturbation, explains how this is actually a sin, and how we can be freed through Christ.” 

This anti-masturbation sentiment from the religious right is something I simply can’t understand.  My boyfriend, a fierce advocate of understanding people with opposing viewpoints, has taught me to at least try to understand people with opposing opinions on issues that are important to me (I admit, I struggle a bit).  However, even he doesn’t get this one. 

Masturbation in moderation, unlike some of the religious right’s other professed “enemies” has no negative consequences.  I can at least see where they’re coming from on the whole “abstinence only until marriage” thing.  True, it doesn’t work, but if it did we would have a whole lot less sexually transmitted infections and unplanned pregnancies.  It’s essentially a case of the religious right being overly idealistic and ignoring the cold hard facts.  But masturbation?  Discouraging masturbation is likely to backfire and encourage earlier engagement in partnered sexual activity.  Plus, saying no to masturbation is a pretty far-fetched demand, and it’s likely to create a lot more guilty constituents.  Even former U.S. Surgeon General Joycelyn Elders, speaking to a U.N. Conference on AIDS in 1994 suggested that masturbation “is part of human sexuality, and perhaps it should be taught.”  Oh, wait, she got herself fired for that comment. 

In an effort to understand the roots behind the “Ex-Masturbator” t-shirt, I contacted the people at P4CM.  I haven’t heard back yet, but maybe their response will inspire answers to some of my musings...

What if we could catapult off P4CM’s desire to “break the silence” around masturbation?  What if girls were told to not be ashamed of touching their bodies?  What if the campaign to create ex-masturbators met an equally powerful campaign to achieve the universal goal of prolonging sex by encouraging masturbation, a safe and healthy alternative to intercourse?