KarachiYWOCLC
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I recently started following Angie Jackson on twitter - you know, the woman who live-tweeted her abortion and became a subject of natural interest? Yeah. That one. In case you haven't heard about her, here is a short excerpt from the story that Huffington Post wrote about her.
Florida resident Angie Jackson, known on her blog as Angie the Anti-Theist, rocked the blogosphere on February 22 when she decided to live-tweet her abortion in order to 'demystify abortions for other women.'Right after taking RU-486, a pill that induces miscarriage, Angie started the cameras rolling, creating a YouTube video that was recorded during the abortion itself and included a justification of her decision.
She says,
For a variety of reasons, including very high health risks for me, I am having an abortion. Right now. [...] But yeah I'm having an abortion right now. It's not that bad, it's not that scary, it's basically like a miscarriage.
Angie explains her decision in the YouTube video (see below):
I'm live tweeting my abortion on Twitter--not for some publicity stunt or for attention or to justify this to myself, I am at peace with my decision. I'm doing this to demystify abortion. I'm doing this so that other women know, 'Hey, it's not nearly as terrifying as I had myself worked up thinking it was.' It's just not that bad. This is nothing compared to childbirth, compared to labor, or, for me and my risks, late stage pregnancy.
I have logged into Twitter eagerly everyday to read the new opinions that people have of her and how she is surviving the media circus. It has been an interesting mix - people sending her hate-mail, praying for her tarnished soul, commending her courage or urging her on. She has taken it all in stride.
I will not make known my personal opinion on matter in this post as i have learned that it is sometimes best to keep one's personal opinion to one's self in order to avoid being given the stink-eye as i have just been subjected to at work. Don't get me wrong, i am proud of my choice and will readily defend it if i am presented with a challenge.
In short form, this uproar, (both at my workplace this afternoon, and on Twitter) has inspired the short story below. Please enjoy and leave your comments. Also, feel free to tell me what you think about the Angie Jackson situation. Would you have an abortion? Or wouldn't you? What are the reasons for your choices?
Watching her with him I feel myriad emotions. I feel mirth – he is a precocious child who has an opinion about everything, no matter what the subject is or how far removed from them his comments are. I feel wonderment – he is a 3 foot tall, brown-skinned angel with Asian features inherited from his parents. I feel a pang of longing – she tells me that living with him is an adventure and I can see that it is true; I want to have a wee one like him to love and to laugh with everyday. And lastly, I feel guilt for the one that I gave up. For the blessing that I carried in my belly for 2¾ months before I decided that I couldn’t go on.
That decision will haunt me for the rest of my life. This is one decision that I will never forgive myself for no matter how many times the doctors, nurses and counselors tell me that me that it is ok to have had the abortion; it was a tough decision, but one that I had to make anyway because of my situation at the time. It is harder to let go because I am a Catholic – a religious race which is largely pro-life. A few months after my abortion, I opened my prayer book as I did every day, only to stumble upon a prayer for the unborn souls of aborted children and the forgiveness of the sins of their wicked mothers.
However, I do not regret my decision. I think about what my life might have been like as a young single mother, but I cannot picture it. Before I met Christopher’s mother, when I did see myself as a mother, it was as one of the harried looking ones with too many bags and a pram, strolling across campus. Now I see how sweet life can be when you have a child like Christopher, no matter the situation in which you got pregnant. And I know that I will get the chance to try again, when the time is right. I know that I will have the chance to laugh at my baby’s silly comments, wordless songs, and enthusiastic mirth. And when those days come, I will remember, the first time he made me smile.
If I found out tomorrow that I was pregnant, I would have an abortion. I'm not ready to be a mother, and I make no apologies for that. I look forward to the day that I am ready, but that's not in the near future for me. The day I do find out I'm pregnant, I want to be overjoyed, not horrified.
As for the short story, is that based on your personal experience?
I know that if I got pregnant now- if I found out now- I would have to make the biggest decision of my life. I'm extremely pro-choice, and I will stand by that. That being said, I recently had a dream in which I'd had a child, and given her to a woman in an open adoption. She looked just like me, and had my boyfriend's lips and ears. Her name was Lily. I remember crying, and wanting her horribly. I would want her to live, and I would want her to be mine but I know I can't provide for her. Furthermore, I know I'm not strong enough to let her go. I think I would have to abort, but I would be unhappy about it for a long time. I could only hope that when I do have children that I finally find closure in what I'd done, knowing that I couldn't give my children the life I'm giving them if I hadn't aborted.
Thanks for the post.