In response to Jasminemysistahs posting,

The recent exclusive on ABC News about “Why Successful Black Women are Single” raised a lot of personal questions.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_i1bqLZZX4M&feature=rec-LGOUT-exp_r2-2r-2-HM

What stood out to me most was this quote …

“If we put all black men into a room and took out the ones without a High School Diploma, without a job, and those between the ages of 25-34 who are in jail… this would leave only about 50% of black men eligible.”

How depressing! Not to mention if I add in some of my personal deal breakers…

Lack of an advanced degree such as Master’s, MD, JD, PhD (or definitive plans to get one), Independent, Ambitious, Caring and all of the other traits I’m seeking

Add all of that up  = Single Erin ?

In the interview, Comedian Steve Harvey asked  “If you’re a corporate exec, does he have to be a corporate exec?   You make $150,000 does he have to make $150,000?”

YES Steve, he does!  I want an equal.

But on the other hand, it does make me think.  Are my standards too high?  Am I really setting myself up for loneliness because I refuse to compromise on qualities that I feel are detrimental to building a successful relationship?  Or maybe it’s time to try “something new”?

The movie “Something New” (2006) starring Sanaa Lathan and the delicious Simon Baker entailed a successful black woman reluctantly starting a relationship with a white landscaper.  This being her first interracial relationship she was apprehensive, as many of us are. (Class also played a role in her apprehension). It was nice to see black women in an interracial relationship for a change.

Obviously, black men have no problem dating every ethnicity and nationality of women.  Why can't we do the same?  Especially with collegiate black women, the pickings are slim.  Speaking from experience, at my predominately white universities (both undergrad and grad), black women outnumbered black men at least 2 to 1.  So this meant that either half of us weren't going to be dating at school or we were all dating (and sleeping) with the same guys.  And as I enter the professional world, I expect this problem to get worse. 

Now that it’s 2010, I’m choosing to try something new.  I believe in soul mates but mine may not be the black man that I’m expecting.  I, like the women in video, want the whole package: the career and the family.  But that may not happen, if we continue stick to what we know.  It’s time to expand our horizons, whatever that may mean to you.

And as usual, regardless of whom you date and sleep with, do so safely and protect yourself!